You can't be a real country unless you have a beer and ....

You can't be a real country unless you have a beer and an airline, it helps if you have some kind of football team, or some nuclear weapons, but in the very least you need a beer.

Frank Zappa

Art is making something out ...

Art is making something out of nothing, and selling it.

Frank Zappa

I never set out to be weird. It was ....

I never set out to be weird. It was always other people who called me weird.

Frank Zappa

There is more stupidity than hydrogen in ...

There is more stupidity than hydrogen in the universe, and it has a longer shelf life.

Frank Zappa

If you end up with a boring miserable life because ....

If you end up with a boring miserable life because you listened to your mom, your dad, your teacher, your priest, or some guy on television telling you how to do your shit, then you deserve it.

Frank Zappa

A mind is like a parachute. It doesn't ....

A mind is like a parachute. It doesn't work if it is not open.

Frank Zappa

Without music to decorate it, time is ....

Without music to decorate it, time is just a bunch of boring production deadlines or dates by which bills must be paid.

Frank Zappa

Without deviation from the norm....

Without deviation from the norm, progress is not possible.

Frank Zappa

So many books, so little time.

So many books, so little time.

Frank Zappa

If you want to get laid, go to

If you want to get laid, go to college. If you want an education, go to the library.

Frank Zappa